I promise to not leave you out of the loop on our life story. Lot's of stuff is going on around here with our adoption and we just left one of the most depressing meetings I have ever been a part of.
Today, Mr. T and I went downtown to meet with out sweet adoption worker to look through a book of children that were up for adoption this month through the Department of Human Services (DHS). Each name comes with a sweet picture and a short history of that child's likes, dislikes, siblings, and why they were taken into DHS custody.
Every kid is adorable and every kid is "normal".
But we did not see our child.
I looked at the beautiful faces and heard the tragic life stories and I just wanted to scream. I wish I could give every one of them the home that they needed, but I can't. I am constantly praying for clarity to "know" which child is mine and I have not had that yet.
I am not patient.
I know that this process will teach me to be patient and also teach me about the brokenness of the world.
I know that our child will most likely need counseling or special doctor's visits, but I want to be the one to hold their hand during that process.
I know that this is going to be a long process and I told myself to brace for that, but every time I see a smiling face in one of those books, it gets harder. It gets harder to wait for my child.
We are also thinking about going through a Crisis Pregnancy group, where pregnant mothers would choose us to be the parents of their unborn child. I don't know if that is the road we are going to take, but it is now on the table.
So we will continue to wait and pray for clarity and guidance throughout this process.
But as of right now, we have no news.
Thank you again for your kind words, thoughts and prayers.
They really do mean the world.